“THE PAST IS YOUR LESSON. THE FUTURE IS YOUR GIFT. THE FUTURE IS YOUR MOTIVATION.”
24 lessons for 24 Years
Hey my loves! Many of you know it’s my birthday month or as I call it, JOIUARY! (I know so extra). So today is my birthday and since I turned 24, I thought what better way to celebrate than think about what I have been through so far. I think birthdays are so precious and should be celebrated because it’s another year you have on this Earth. I plan on spending my day/weekend with the people who I love. I thought I’d share with you all what I have learned in my life so far.
1. LEARN TO SAY NO!
As I said on my New Year’s post, it took me so long to learn this. For the longest, I was basing my decisions on the fact that I didn’t want to hurt peoples feelings or let anyone down and only one person ended up upset…ME, Whether it was trying to impress guys or not hurt family, I just couldn’t say no. I had to have a talk with myself and decided to started to put me first and things have been better ever since.
2. STOP BEING AFRAID TO EXPRESS YOUR FEELINGS!
I don’t know why, but I was a person who would rarely cry, especially in public. Although I still try not to cry in public, I am doing better with showing emotion because despite what society tells you, it is okay to have feelings. You know that saying “closed mouths don’t get fed”. Let people know how you feel but in a respectful way. Get your point across with a delivery to make them understand.
3. PATIENCE!
This was one of the hardest lessons that I am still learning. I like to see results right away. When I go to the gym, I want to see that butt that I’ve been putting in work for. At work I want to get that appreciation that I’ve been working for. But, one day I realized that great things take time.
4. A MAN WHO SEES YOU AS NOTHING IS NOT WORTH IT!
I once had a guy have the nerve to tell me that im not “wife material” and all I could do was laugh, because I wanted to know which he wanted to be that day, the pot or the kettle but I digress. I was purposely not showing him any wife traits because one, he didn’t earn it, two, I wasn’t his girl, and three, I was not a wife. Don’t ask me am I a wife, ask yourself are you a husband? I’m not here for your benefit. Same thing goes for a job, you know your skills and what you’re worth, so why lower your standards and settle for less?
5. LET IT GO!
There comes a time where you realize when you cannot control anything or anyone. You have to take some L’s in life, which makes life interesting. Imagine how boring life would be if you got your way all the time. You just have to accept reality and move on. Take the experiences of this loses and let the situation go.
6. YOUNG MISTAKES WILL FOLLOW YOU INTO ADULTHOOD!
Although you should live your life to the fullest when you are young, you need to be careful of how you go about it. Don’t post every single move you make on a public platform. Leave a little mystery. Give people just enough to make them feel like they know you personally. The little mistakes you make that are bad sometimes can hurt your future career or relationship, so be careful.
7. PUT SOME MONEY ASIDE FOR THE FUTURE!
I was always taught to never be broke. I always have something just for emergencies. I also believe in saving…maybe for future trips, rainy day troubles, a house. I just know how money runs the world and in order to survive, you must have money. Make sure you have your own back.
8. BE OKAY WITH BEING SINGLE!
It is okay to be alone. There is a difference from being alone and being lonely. The moment you go looking is when you settle and you will end up unhappy. Your King will come to you when the time is right. There truly is a season for everything. You need to learn to being single in order to know how to be in a relationship and value a person. If you do things right and don’t rush singleness then you will not have any regrets in a relationship.
9. GO OUT AND ENJOY MY YOUNG YEARS!
For a while I was hard on myself which led me into being depressed, but that is another story. Instead of going straight home and laying in my bed all day curled up in a ball and picking myself apart. I am going out again with friends and enjoying life.
10. STOP MAKING EXCUSES FOR PEOPLE!
This is a lesson that I have a hard time doing but I need to. For the longest I was coming up with excuses for people who weren’t even giving them themselves. “Oh, they’re just super busy” or “He’s just shy”…false. I hate that I always try to see the good in people which isn’t bad, except when you aren’t paying attention to the bad in them. Let them speak for themselves or pay attention to the reality.
11. STOP PROCRASTINATING!
I think this is something that most struggle with, and I think it has a lot to do with fear. At least for me it does. I’m mainly afraid of the outcome, like this blog for example. I kept telling people who I wanted to start one, but i kept putting it off because I didn’t know how well it would do. You just have to stop putting things of and do it right then.
12. FORGIVENESS!
Learn to forgive yourself. This is just as important as forgiving others. But letting things go, keep you from stressing. I was taught at a young age to forgive people even when they don’t give you an apology
13. YOU CAN’T CHANGE WHAT YOU DON’T ACKNOWLEDGE!
This can be applied in so many places. But if you keep seeing the same results with things, lets use relationships for example, look at what you are doing or the choices you are making and see if they need to change. For me, it was the fact that I wasn’t paying attention to how the guys act in reality, instead I was imagining them being this perfect guy in my head. I had to change that. Instead of placing guys on a pedestal (which I did with a lot of worthless guys from my past), I took a look at their behavior and actions and realize they were worthless.
14. CONFIDENCE MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL!
I kid you not, most of the guys that were in my life said that besides my beauty, my confidence is what captured them. At first I was confused, “Like really I was just being me”. They say they liked someone who knew that she was bad and didn’t care what anyone else had to say. If you know you are bomb, someone else’s opinion is a non factor. You can be in sweats with no makeup and a ponytail but it’s how you rock the sweats, no makeup, and ponytail that matters.
15. BE YOUR BIGGEST FAN!
One of my favorite quotes is “If you don’t have any shadows you’re not in the light”
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16. TELL THE TRUTH!
Keep it real with both yourself and everyone else. Just be careful of how you deliver the information. Do not be rude about it. As long as you are truthful, no one, including yourself can be upset about you keeping it real. People honestly respect the truth.
17. PEOPLE NEED TO EARN ACCESS TO YOU!
Do not just be an open book to people, who did not put in work to get close to you. I’m not saying
18. KNOW YOUR WORTH!
So this applies to both jobs and relationships. Once you know what you’re worth, you won’t settle for less. Realize that you deserve the best and that anyone who can’t do that can kick rocks. There are so many people and opportunities in the world, there is no point in settling for mediocre.
19. GUARD YOUR ENERGY!
There are a lot of people are just in your life to drain you. Drain your happiness and use you. They will do or say things that they know will get under your skin just to make themselves feel better. You need to be aware of who you keep in your circle so you can enjoy life and continue to progress.
20. GREAT THINGS TAKE TIME!
All I can say about this, that it is not about the finish, it is about the journey and it will be worth it.
21. VALUE YOUR PRIVACY!
You do not have to tell anyone something that is not their business. You have a right to keep some things between just you and God. This keeps you from a lot of drama or misconceptions.
22. DO THINGS FOR YOU!
I am the type of person who will go out of my way to spoil others because I love to see people happy and be the reason that they are. But there comes a time where you need to put yourself first and that is my focus this year. SPoil yourself. Take yourself shopping. Take yourself to the movies. WOrkout for yourself. DO all that you would do for someone else for yourself.
23. KARMA IS REAL!
You may not have a front row seat to it but yes it does occur. I think the most important thing is to focus on your karma, There are two types of karma: Good and Bad. The person who decides which karma you will get is….you.
24. REJECTION IS REDIRECTION!
This is a lesson everyone knows or will know about. THis could be when is comes to applying for jobs or schools. Also when it comes to relationships. I believe that when something does not go right, of course I am going to be upset at first, but after I get pass that stage, I tell myself it wasn’t meant to be. I mean I came past this quote one day “If you want it, you’ll find a way, if you don’t you’ll find an excuse. This can be applied to so many situations and to my ladies especially keep this in mind so you don’t chase a guy. Take that L and keep on pushing because good things are coming.
There are five things you can’t force: Respect, Love, Gratitude, a change of heart, and forgiveness. Hope you enjoyed reading this! Like, Comment, and Follow my page!
-The birthday girl
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